I'd like to get more personal about my experience as an INFP. I've learned a lot about INFP's online through blogs, forums, and youtube. I really enjoy learning from and seeing other INFP's. I don't know many INFP's in real life and so I really appreciate all of the different things that I have been able to learn from my fellow INFP friends. It was so interesting to see how few of us are around. It makes a lot of sense to me personally though. I've always felt different from the crowd. Its cool in a way because I feel that if everyone was the same and conformed to norms it would leave very little room for creativity, independent thought and lifestyle, and groundbreaking energy. This is counter culture in a lot of ways. It's not to say that everything I do is different or has to be but I strive to be my own person and to add a color to this world that is fresh. It is important for me to make my own individual mark that impacts this world in a positive way. I truly feel that every type plays an integral part in society and we can all learn from each type. It is nice to appreciate our differences as INFP's though because oftentimes we are seen as the odd ball out in a lot of ways and our side is worthy of just as much validation.
Being an INFP is amazing but it is also challenging. My mood or state of mind has a very strong energy to it and if I want to be productive and have a healthy well-being I have to maintain my own sense of equilibrium or all hell breaks loose. We tend to be emotional beings, feeling life very deeply. The surprising thing about this is that the average person that meets us would never think how emotional or prone to feeling we are because our emotions are (FI introverted feeling) so we don't express them as often to others. If I'm having a hard time and in a negative state of mind, it may take some time but I will bring myself out of these states with the right focus on the good in life. So emotions are ever present in us INFP's. We experience life very deeply and nuanced. Highs and lows. I have to be very aware of the energy I am letting into my energy and the thoughts, ideas, and beliefs I hold because I know how even subtle changes in energy feels and effects the way I live.
I tend to be idealistic. Idealistic about the world, who I am as a person, my day to day life, and my expectations in relationships. Like everything this has its advantages and disadvantages. This motivates me to push myself to be who I really want to be. It also means that when I mess up, even just a little, it seems like a lot to me because I strive for so much more. I feel the consequences of each action that I make. This makes me responsible in my actions but it also puts a lot of unnecessary pressure on myself.Sometimes I get idealistic about the world. It is tough externally because I want the people I love to be happy and although I can help them experience joy I can not chose their energy for them. At the end of the day I know that my intentions are good and I can have a positive impact on the lives of the people I care about, even if I can't be inside of their heads steering their gears. Who's to say that if I were living their experiences day in and day out that I'd be able to get out of the funk that they are in anyways. I can't control external circumstances but I can always make my mark and try to impact their lives positively by being focused and positive in my intentions and actions.
My thoughts and ideas build upon each other and I have to make an effort to chose which train of thought I am going to ride. This enables me to think of new related ideas easily but it can also lead to being scattered and unorganized mentally.
Being an INFP in a predominantly S and E environment has it's challenges. Sometimes I fit into the groups I am in but other times I just feel like an outsider, and that's okay. Every interaction, every person I come into contact with can have meaning and purpose. Another thing that is very important to me, along with resiliency. I know that no matter what I am faced with I can lift myself up again, because I have done it time and time again. From the depths of sorrow and pain, to having fun with life and living a life focused outwards and to the betterment of this world.
That's all for today. Thanks for listening to my rants. I'm finding this very therapeutic. I love writing!
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